Worst movie ever made? #98

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus sounds like some absurd sci-fi film from the 50s, perhaps in the same vain as Plan 9 from outer space or The Blob. But no this film was made in 2009. Perhaps it should have been made in the 50s, at least then someone would have been stupid enough to see it. The 50s had good films but they had terrible ones like every other decade.

I think the actors want to stay anonymous (i sure would) so i wont name names when it comes to wooden acting (*cough*everyone*cough*). I did enjoy the parts where the actors are meant to show emotion because it's laughable, for all i know they are good actors, but the script is what really destroyed them.

A mega shark and a giant octopus are battling it out for some reason (somebody inked where the shouldn't have...) but they get frozen during their epic battle and wake up 18 million years in the future (as you do.) They keep fighting. Its up to Emma Mcneil to stop the warring beasts who may tear apart the entire world if they keep fighting.

I'd like to add some trivia here: the trailer said 10 million  years ago but the guy in the movie said 18 million years ago. somebody's calender must be wrong.
It's little mistakes and WTF fails like this that make the movie enjoyable. It is frightfully stupid and made me lose faith and monster films for a while, but in retrospect it could have been worse. it could have become completely illogical and had the shark jump out of the ocean and take down a plane... oh wait, nope, never mind.

i wouldn't put in the 'so bad its good' category, but if you want to laugh at a sci-fi film (that also claims to be a horror) that isn't from the 50s (i really have to stop lambasting 50s sci fi, i actually liked some of their stuff...) then watch this. Maybe you could make a day of it  and see the sequel: Mega Shark Vs Crocosaurus. Yeah, thats the title.

"Those guys have been frozen in ice for millions of years, wouldn't you be a little horny?" Lamar Sanders (Sean Lawler) Mega Shark Vs Giant Octopus 

Worst movie ever made? #100

i have decided to try and post about 100 of the worst movies ever, not all in one post but you get what i mean. i want you to know that even though i'm counting down it doesn't mean that i'd necessarily rate them in that order, it's just the order i thought of them in.

Today i thought of a terrifically bad movie, i think that a lot of people know about it and it probably has a cult following somewhere but it's still a very, very bad film: Troll 2 (1990). Currently #62 on IMDB Bottom 100 and   starring people whose careers were ruined shortly after the release. Moment of silence for those terrible, terrible actors.

Director Claudio Fragrasso (so he's who we blame) was (is?) Italian which probably lead to mis communications with the cast and crew so i suppose i can't blame him for the movies outcome. The movies plot wasn't so great either- "A young boy is horrified to find that a family trip is being haunted by his worst nightmare."
From just reading that you wouldn't think it's great but no terrible, I've been going on about how bad it is but what was bad about it? here:

• "the powers of evil are very strong here- i must leave" was the script writer sniffing newsprint?
• The town is called "Nilbog" (10 points if you know what it says spelled backwards)
• There are no trolls in this movie- just goblins
• It's meant to be a comedy and theres nothing worst than a horror comedy without comedy. Well, i did laugh, but not with it

I should have put this on my 'the dark side of sequels' post (which is below this one) but Troll 2 isn't really a sequel, it's a completely different movie based on the moderately successful Troll (1986). Oh and um while we're at it: the sex scene with the popcorn... well its was strange, which wasn't helped by the fact that the scene wasn't actually needed.

If you want to watch a movie about Trolls watch Troll, not Troll 2, if you want a movie about goblins watch The Labyrinth, not Troll 2, if you want to watch a movie that makes you ache for Plan 9 from outer space, then by all means- watch Troll 2.

"They're eating her... and then they're going to eat me! OH MY GOD!" Arnold (Darren Ewing) Troll 2